I am new here and will try to share my personal experience. I am divorced and mom of a six-year old son. My first marriage was arranged by my parents and I had no objection with it but my inlaws were very mean... and they pushed my husband to divorce me. My husband was not faithful either and I took seperation. I was seperated for 3 years+ and then my ex initiated the divorce. During this phase i decided to dedicate my life to my son and never get married...but yes I did feel lonliness at times. Whenever I used to feel that I used to recite duas as much as I could. After my divorce... I started reciting Qul HU Allah every night and during this time I met someone online...who was exactly that I was looking for in a spouse. He and I live in different states and he also cared a lot for me and gave me the respect that I always wanted. It was mashallah A paak saaf relationship. Then after talking to him for a while I decided to meet him and before meeting him I recited darud-e-tanjaina...clearly asking ALLAh that if this person is not for me may I don't meet him. To my surprise the moment we met we felt peace of mind. Then I did Istikharas and got no dream but a positive feeling was there. Now after that I have had few dreams of me and him:
1. One time i saw myself having a baby and all relatives gathered around me and he was there too. My ammi was telling everyone that I had no idea such nice people exist in this world.
2. I saw his mom visiting me and inquiring about me and in the end she said to my son..."YOUR PHUPHOS will love you".... as in his sisters.
My nikkah with him (I saw this dream several times)
Besides all these dreams...my chachi did istikhara for me as well...and she had the same dream that someone in her family had a baby.
Now all seems positive and honestly I started developing feelings for this person. I never knew what love was and i actually felt for this guy. I don't know what happened and some problems in his family came and he asked for some faasla. I know he cares for me and he loves me a lot as well. But it kind of hurts me.
Now I have started Qul Huwa;;;ah for 90days..also ya badi ul ajaibe wazifa.
My question is I asked ALLAH at every stage.... it felt there was no problem./..my feelings got stronger...then why this rukawat. his family does'nt know about me yet. I really want to settle down with a nice person but with someone i love.
PLease advice what should I do?